If you’ve recently begun dating a new woman, you probably have a lot of questions and trepidations. Could this be ‘the one’? Could this, in fact, be the person you’ve been seeking out your whole life? You don’t want to make any premature judgments early on, but likewise, you don’t want to miss out on any opportunities.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make with a new woman in your life is holding yourself back. Many guys aren’t sure that this is the right one to go after, so they hold themselves back. Women can sense this, and even the greatest woman in the world will be disappointed if she sees that you’re not putting forth effort on her behalf.
The first thing you want to do is pay attention to what she likes and what she values. Where did you first meet her? At a bar or at a bookstore? Is she more at home with a volume of Proust or a crystal necklace? It doesn’t really matter which she goes for, as long as you pay attention to what’s going on.
The reason you want to pay attention is so you can prepare for the all important first gift. This is a major milestone that can really let this woman know you care about her and want to move forward. While season tickets to the Sox or a tote bag could make one woman go wild, the other may balk with disinterest. Likewise, a first edition ‘Brothers Karamazov’ may rock her world.
This is a major problem actually. Too many men are content on just giving the basic gifts. Whether it’s boxes of chocolates, a jewelry set, or flowers, the day for such gifts is long over. While they do show a bit of thoughtfulness, they don’t show that you’ve really paid attention to this woman and learned what she truly likes and values.
Once you know what you’re going to give her, be aware that timing is everything. If you give a gift too early in the game, you can come across as needy or too eager and this can scare women away. On the other hand, if you hold out too long, she may lose interest. Pay attention to the signs and strike when the time is right.
Ultimately, what it all comes down to is the recognition that women are people with unique interests and values. Pay attention to them, learn what these are, and then be kind in ways that will be personally meaningful to her. She will feel loved, and you may have just succeeded in snagging ‘the one’.
